What Do You Do All Day? Year FIVE

It suddenly hit me just now that I am now starting my fifth year as a mother. My fifth year outside full-time employment. May is also a significant month for us because last year, we were about to close on our house at this time, and the year before that, I quit my job, became a stay-at-home mother, and left San Franciso.

So yeah, I'm embarking on my third year as a stay-at-home mom. Crazy.

How better to celebrate all these milestones than to answer that question so many stay-at-home moms get asked: What do you do all day? (I did this last year, during the very first year, and well, it seems like I did it when Nutmeg was 2 but maybe I forgot.

But that's not now, that's then. Here we go:

6:08 Nutmeg, who sleeps in our bed the second half of every night, wakes up all bubbly. Since neither of us can see the clock without our glasses on, Epu asks Nutmeg to read out the numbers. When he finds out it's just after six, tries to convince her to go back to sleep. Then the baby starts crying. I inform him that day has begun and kick all their butts out of the bedroom.

7 Hear Pebbles crying downstairs, and saying, "Ma-mee,Ma-mee." She won't seem to stop. Zombie-walk downstairs, nurse Pebbles, and zombie walk back to bed, ignoring Epu's conversational gambits.

7:30 So much noise. Epu has brought both kids upstairs since he has to shower. Get up.

Drink a little coffee, read a little paper.

8 Epu departs. Help Nutmeg write her name on some thank-you cards for recent birthday gifts.

8:15 Take baby upstairs with me so I can shower. Play peek-a-boo with shower curtain.

8:40 Bolt down some free cereal. Get snack for preschool class together.

8:45 Get photo memory card ready to make prints if am able to stop at CVS on way back from preschool drop-off

8:50 Brush teeth along with Nutmeg. Notice that Pebbles has found herself crayons and paper and is happily scribbling away. Note with satisfaction that she seems to understand that crayons are for paper, not the floor.

8:59 Get all of us out the door and lug baby down to the corner to the school.

9:05 Hang out at the preschool for awhile since Pebbles is having so much fun playing with giant legos. Chat with moms and teachers.

9:15 Warn preschool teachers that I may not make it back to help with snack since Pebbles got up too early and likely won't make it past noon before starting her nap.

9:25 Home. Let Pebbles play in yard while I cut dead balloons from the plastic cottage.

9:30 Inside. Call pediatrician's office to ask for a records request form since we are changing doctors.

9:40 Work for a moment on one of my many blogs.

9:50 Turn on Oprah. Load dishwasher. Chat with Pebbles. Color with Pebbles.

10 Back outside, with an orange for Pebbles and a cup of coffee for myself. Weather gorgeous. Set Pebbles up at little picnic table. Try to get yard raked in preparation for seeding our patchy lawn.

10:15 Pebbles plays in sandbox for a long time while I rake and weed. Awesome.

10:30 Realize that I am raking GRASS, which I am allergic to, and have not taken ANY of my three allergy medications this morning. Sprint into house to administer drugs.

10:45 Attempt to use baby gate purchased at rummage sale to block off concrete outdoor basement stairs. Doesn't work.

10:50 Accept that only about 1/4 of the lawn will get raked today. Think about how I should really set up the sprinkler to water all the seeds we planted. Also think about sweeping and washing deck, then think about repairs or rebuilding needed by deck, and about how outdoor stair railing was never painted, and am overwhelmed by the number of jobs that the entire house needs.

11 Change poopy diaper. Get ready to head out the door.

11:02 Open one of the baby gates, only to have an entire chunk of woodwork where the gate was anchored fall off the wall, along with globs of plaster. Imagine a cloud of lead dust settling around the room. This does nothing for my generalized home-maintenance anxiety.

11:05 Head back over to preschool for snack time.

11:10 Pebbles loves to be at preschool! She gets to sit at the table with the big kids and color with markers, then eat snack. 4-year-old girls argue over who gets to sit next to her.

11:40 Pebbles joins right in at circle time and shouts out her own answers to the teacher's questions. Nutmeg stands up in front of the class, snackmeister for the very last time since school ends in 3 weeks.

12 Warn Nutmeg that she may NOT run off to the playground upon leaving school today because we have a tight schedule. Receive yet another birthday gift for Nutmeg from a classmate as we walk out.

12:05 Nutmeg and Pebbles pet the neighbor's cat, who has been waiting for them in front of our house.

12:10 Try to feed Nutmeg and Pebbles lunch on the deck, despite the fact that they just had fig newtons and Goldfish at school 1/2 an hour ago. Manage to get a few pieces of cheese into Pebbles. Nutmeg ignores food and opens, plays with new birthday gift.

12:30 Change another poopy diaper. Jeez, what's with these bowels today?

12:35 Nurse Pebbles to sleep while Nutmeg plays in back yard. While nursing, worry about money and plot the many, many things I'd like to get done this afternoon and in the evening after the kids are in bed. Change to sundress, shave legs. Get stressed by messiness upstairs: pile of clean laundry waiting to be folded, the rug that I put in the bedroom that needs to be removed because it stops the bedroom door from opening or closing.

12:45 Get gardening tools from the garage. Notice how messy garage is and how that bag of dirty diapers is still sitting on the hood of the car where I left it that morning. Contemplate how it seems like there is a new mess or task around every corner, about every minute of the day. Wonder how other parents and homeowners manage to get everything done.

Get Nutmeg's bike, and Nutmeg into front yard. Accidentally pinch Nutmeg's chin skin in helmet latch. Allow myself to be guilted into not making her wear helmet. Apply sunblock to both of us.

12:50 Inside to Google advice on moving bushes.

1 pm Begin trying to dig up one of the bushes in front of our house. The plan is to remove the current evergreen shrubs in order to plant two dwarf lilacs we bought yesterday.

1:05 Enjoy using brand new shovel. Give Nutmeg freshly dug-up worms.

1:15 Sweat. Get scratches and itchy redness all over arms and legs from bush's needles.

1:30 Realize that this job is going to be much, much tougher than I had hoped. Also, bush is probably not going to survive this as a number of roots have been severed.

1:45 Remember seeing on Craigslist some people advertising free bushes for anyone who can come dig them up. Wonder if anyone wants these scraggly looking things as much as I want them out.

2 Decide I am definitely going to try to get someone else to remove bush number two. That is, if I survive attempts to remove bush number 1.

2:10 Hope that the classes of junior high kids passing by each hour to use the nearby athletic fields cannot see my underwear when I tug at this stubborn bush.

2:15 Appreciate the fact that at least Nutmeg is entertaining herself nicely with her friends, the worms, and is only sporadically insisting on "helping."

2:25 Hope during one of her helping episodes that she doesn't get hurt when I use this big old shovel, which advertises right on itself that its blade is "sharp."

2:30 Neighbor comes outside and gives Nutmeg a birthday gift. Is also kind enough to help her get it out of the packaging, since I am elbows deep in the dirt in front of our house. Neighbor says my gardening "looks great." I have a pile of dirt spilling out of the flower bed, a shrub that is beginning to loosen up but for one big, woody root, and a few potted shrublings sitting on the lawn. Wonder if neighbor is trying to hide a really bad case of myopia.

2:45 Give up trying to preserve bush and chop at root with shovel. Sharp, my ass.

2:50 Clip ineffectually at root with tiny garden clippers.

2:55 Really want to give up. Wonder what time it is.

3 Baby is crying. Thank you, baby. Put away shovel, herd Nutmeg to back yard.

3:05 Get baby, nurse, change ANOTHER poopy.

3:10 Another quick shower for me to remove dirt from arms, legs.

3:20 Yell out the window to make sure Nutmeg is ok. She has actually come in already, it turns out.

3:30 Throw on clothes, get Nutmeg's swimming suit and a towel.

3:36 Tell Nutmeg, let's go to swimming. Nutmeg replies, correctly: "But I haven't had lunch yet!"

3:38 Grab a bag of Quakes (flavored rice cake), a can of coke, sippy of milk, and 3 cheese sticks. Tell Nutmeg how sweet she is when she takes one cheese stick and gives the others to Pebbles and me.

3:40 Drive to the gym. Resist temptation to use driving time to return a phone call I got this morning. Nutmeg reads the snack bag in the car: "Quacky's." Remind Nutmeg about the magical powers of silent E.

4:10 Get Nutmeg into swimsuit and into the pool area five minutes early. Teacher comments on how we are early! As in, not late for once!

4:20 Drop off Pebbles in babysitting room. Joke with the babysitting ladies.

4:25 Come to computer room and type this.

5 p.m. Audibly gasp in realization that swimming class is ending NOW a floor down.

5:05 p.m. Dash into pool area, where Nutmeg is the only kid left, shivering in a borrowed towel. Apologize to teacher.

5:07 p.m. Nutmeg takes a shower, I help her get dressed. Remember that we left the toy the neighbor just gave Nutmeg sitting in the front lawn near partially-exhumed bush. Worry that she'll think we're ungrateful.

5:15 p.m. Bring Nutmeg to babysitting room. Comfort Pebbles, who is upset, and give her some rice cakes, which make her happy.

5:20 Back to the computer lab for more writing and a couple of business emails. Set a new volunteer schedule for myself for May with the volunteer director. Explain to him, on request, what blogging is.

5:45 Pick up kids and wonder what we are going to have for dinner since I used my dinner-making time to partially dig up a bush.

As we sit outside our garage, with me pressing and pressing the garage door controller before it works, Nutmeg informs me that 2 and 3 make 5. She does a lot of these little math problems in the car, I've noticed.

6 Kids play in the yard while I look up a couple of potato recipes in Jane Brody. Wanted to make potato souffle but with 45 minutes till dinner it's not gonna happen. End up repurposing leftover homemade coleslaw, which Epu hates, into colcannon. Put Cub game on radio.

6:10 Out to the deck to check kids. Pebbles peacefully digging in sandbox. Nutmeg playing in plastic cottage. Weather still beautiful. Take 1/100th of a second to enjoy the moment. Then grab a handful of the wrapping paper littering the deck and run inside to work on dinner while stealing checks on the kids through the window.

6:12 Open a beer.

6:18 Nutmeg comes inside, so I go to fetch Pebbles. Who has begun eating sand. Mmm mmm.

6:20 Shake Pebbles outside, then proceed to sink for hand and face wash. Strap Pebbles into high chair against great protest. Put container of flavored yogurt in front of her and she does her new trick: self feeding.

6:30 While cooking dinner, marvel that this is usually the hardest time of the day, but Nutmeg is playing quietly with one of her new presents, and Pebbles is eating steadily.

6:31 Pebbles screams to get out of high chair, then proceeds to mix it up with sister. Sister puts a bunch of barettes in baby's hair, then for some reason sits on baby, producing loud wails.

6:32 Continue making dinner while threatening time outs.

6:38 Hallelujah, Epu walks in the door 7 minutes early due to having ridden his bike. Nutmeg drags stepstool over to the refrigerator to help herself to yogurt.

6:40 Epu gets Nutmeg outside and helps get picnic table cleared and tablecloth on for dinner. Wade through river of papers and crayons on kitchen floor to ferry plates and dinner from kitchen to deck.

6:45 Dinner on table. It's good but kids are not, being tired and not hungry. Still, we're outside on a beautiful evening. We watch the squirrels and Epu notices that birds are nesting in our eaves again.

7:05 Dinner ends when Nutmeg, playing around at the table, spills (fortunately, cooled) soup all over herself. Actually says she wants to go to bed. Complies with my order to strip down right there on the deck.

7:15 Epu and I get the girls redy for bed together. I take Pebbles, he takes Nutmeg.

7:20 Epu reads both girls a story on the bed while I grab the opportunity to pick up some of the clothes and bath toys (?!) all over the girls' bedroom floor.

7:30 I try nursing Pebbles but she's too keyed up. She wants to get into bed with Nutmeg. We say sure just to see what will happen.

7:35 Pebbles is being rowdy. Nutmeg is trying to get her to lie down.

7:37 At Nutmeg's request, remove Pebbles from her bed. Try nursing again, but she shakes her head no. Put Pebbles in the crib and leave.

7:40 Pebbles cries and cries. Help Epu finish cleaning up from dinner.

7:45 Pebbles still crying. Cubs losing.

7:50 Attack the mess of papers and art supplies on kitchen floor. Decide there is way too much stuff crammed into Nutmeg's art bins, which Pebbles is always getting out and spreading all over. Sit down and organize one bin, throwing away a ton of stuff and sending some to the basement for future use. At some point Pebbles stops crying.

8 Epu goes out to try to finish digging up that shrub. I organize bin. Cubs nearly stage a 9th-inning comeback.

8:30 Epu reports that he got everything but one root. Apparently there were more roots I hadn't even seen. Still, we're back at the same place: partially exhumed shrub.

8:35 Epu gets to work removing baby gate from doorway and reattaching woodwork. He even vacuums up the dust.

9 Cubs lose. Bin organized. I go out to put bike and tricycle away, then go to CVS. Return phone call from that morning on the way there.

Pull off a perfect CVS transaction: Spend 2 ECBs and 69 cents off a gift card, receive 11 ECBs. The junk I buy mostly goes into the donation bag for the homeless shelter, except for the 35-cent filler I bought to make the transaction high enough to ues my coupon. The filler is an oatmeal cream pie. :-)

9:30 Home. File away my CVS money. Epu is struggling to try to export my Shoplifting With Permission blog from Typepad to Blogger for me.

9:35 Go upstairs to slip into something more comfortable.

9:40 Once again confronted with pile of clean laundry on our bed, not to mention the fact that somehow we got the wrong size sheets on our bed this week and they keep slipping off. The whole thing does not look appetizing to sleep on.

Attack the laundry pile. Put new sheets on the bed.

10:10 Back downstairs. Epu still struggling with the blog issue. Wipe down outside tablecloth and bring it in so the squirrels don't poop on it.

10:15 Sign a bunch of little checks for Epu to deposit tomorrow.

10:20 Finish reading the Tribune and the local weekly. Notice that eyes are only slightly burny after spending so much time outside. Yay allergy medicine!

10:30 Pebbles crying. Epu dutifully brings her downstairs so I can nurse her while reading paper. Put her back in bed.

11 Get out coupons to clip for tomorrow's shopping trip. Fire up laptop.

11:15 Type this up.

11:50 Should really be getting to bed. Will probably just finish typing coupons. Must stop staying up so late.

So there you have it. After four years, taking care of the kids more than ever feels just like a job. I don't have as many days as I used to where we just go to the park, stare at the clouds, or spend three hours exploring Target.

Today was definitely on the busy side for us. Fortunately the kids were so good nearly all day. That really made it a good one, despite how extremely tired I am and how sore I am going to be tomorrow due to my struggle with the shrub.

What Do You Do All Day? Year 3

Now that I'm a mom of 2, I'm going to do another minute-by-minute breakdown of the average weekday at home. Except there is no average day. In fact, I hesitate to post this because I had about the easiest day so far yesterday. Fil slept almost all day (and, whoops, was up for almost 3 hours in the middle of the night; we'll wake her up a little more today), Nutmeg was pretty good, and we mostly stayed home after days on the go. By contrast, the day before, I dropped Nutmeg off at a sitter, drove to Oak Park with Fil to tour a school, did a couple in-car nursings and diaper changes, hit Jewel and the Cingular store with both kids, Nutmeg didn't take her nap and peed on the dining room floor, and, just as I was ready to pass out from exhaustion at 8 p.m., Fil threw up all over herself and had to be given a bath.

But here's yesterday:

1:25 a.m. Wake up to the end of "Dr. Phil" on TV. Must have fallen asleep sometime after 11:30 while/after nursing. Lay Filbertine down on back in Snuggle Nest, and she stays asleep.

? a.m. Baby wakes up and I feed her

5:50 a.m. I awake with baby sleeping in my arms in breastfeeding position. I gently lay her down in the Snuggle Nest, rearrange my bedding so that no pillows or blankets are near her, and lie down.

5:51 a.m. Baby squirms and begins sniffling and snorting. Last night it seemed like she was getting a cold so we used saline and the aspirator to clean out her nose. Now I ask Epu if he has the aspirator on his side. He says no, he must have left it in the kitchen. I ask him to go get it. He says no and goes back to sleep.

5:53 a.m. I return from kitchen with aspirator and try to hand it to Epu, who says, "I don't want that," and turns his head away. Baby is still snorting and sniffling. Persuade Epu that he does, indeed want that. Epu complains that he can't see. Less gently, suggest that Epu take baby to changing table in bathroom. Epu grumbles but complies. Yell at Epu for not closing bedroom door.

6 a.m. Sleep

7:50 a.m. Wake to sounds of Epu showering.

8 a.m. Epu brings baby back to bedroom. Breastfeed, and enjoy the silence while Nutmeg is still asleep.

8:15 a.m. Nutmeg wakes up, humming cheerily, and politely asks for water. Feel guilty for wishing she would sleep longer.

8:20 a.m. Nutmeg throws tantrum. Apparently Epu has given her an
open cup of water, which she spilled. Time out for unnecessary tantrum.

8:25 a.m. Head for bathroom. Epu tells Nutmeg he can't start her oatmeal because he will be leaving and mommy is taking a shower. I head off tantrum #2 by suggesting Epu give her a small bowl of cereal while waiting for me to finish.

8:26 a.m. Go to bathroom with door shut. Oh, merciful solitude.

8:28 a.m. Get in shower. Epu comes in to say goodbye and tells me that Nutmeg is eating cereal, Fil is awake in her Snuggle Nest.

8:45 a.m. Get out and dry off. Nutmeg reports she has helped herself to more cereal and needs milk. Pour milk.

8:50 a.m. Dress while baby watches, grunts, squirms.

8:53 a.m. Weigh in. Down about 23 pounds from pregnancy high. 15 pounds to go before Labor Day wedding, pool party and bridesmaid dress.

8:55 a.m. Pick up baby and check out email. Respond to a babysitting request from co-op, typing with one hand.

9 a.m. Feed baby. Lay sleeping baby on tummy. She stays alseep.

9:05 a.m. Turn on Oprah. Summer road trip rerun.

9:06 a.m. Make tea. Since dairy upsets the baby, try pouring coconut milk into raisin bran and tea.

9:15 a.m. Feel nervous about tummy-sleeping baby. Turn her onto back. She wakes up and squirms. Transfer to swing in kitchen.

9:17 a.m. Baby sleeping. Find Nutmeg's last pair of clean underpants and instruct her to put on. She does.

9:20 a.m. Make oatmeal with Nutmeg. Grab bites of cereal in spare moments. It's good with coconut milk.

9:25 a.m. Send Nutmeg off to get pants on.

9:26 a.m. Stand in front of Oprah drinking tea. Hot tea not good with coconut milk. Separates into fatty little particles. Gross.

9:28 a.m. Nutmeg returns with pants on, instruct to go get a shirt.

9:30 a.m. Typing this.

9:32 a.m. Nutmeg comes in with a shirt with colors that match the pants. Good girl.

9:35 a.m. Oatmeal finished. Prep for Nutmeg.

9:38 a.m. Put oatmeal on table and call Nutmeg.

9:39 a.m. Nutmeg appears sans shirt. Explains she has been "looking at movies and telling a story." Sounds fine to me. Must be the cases for the Disney VHS tapes grandparents recently gave us.

9:40 a.m. Updating this.

9:45 a.m. Unload dishwasher, quick kitchen cleanup

9:53 a.m. Take prenatal vitamin and two Tums (for calcium).

9:55 a.m. Nutmeg stops Fil's swing to give her sleeping sister a kiss. Explain gently (for millionth time) that we don't wake up the baby, even for kisses.

9:56 a.m. Nutmeg: "Close your eyes, I have a surprise for you!" Close eyes. Nutmeg: "It's meat!" Presents me with a wooden steak from her play kitchen freezer.

9:57 a.m. Coach Nutmeg on bringing her oatmeal bowl to kitchen. Then the spoon.

9:58 a.m. Send Nutmeg to wash face and brush teeth. Continue kitchen cleanup.

10 a.m. Switch TV/VCR to Channel 9 as am determined not to forget to tape "Millionaire." Good to have goals, isn't it?

10:03 a.m. Just before turning off the television, catch a talk show host named Greg saying that one of his guests has a problem: Her husband is addicted to cleaning. Ha! Ha! Ha!

10:06 a.m. Check on Nutmeg in bathroom. She has emptied my facial moisturizer and filled bottle with water.

10:07 a.m. Second time out of the day.

10:09 a.m. Send Nutmeg back to bathroom for second attempt at brushing teeth.

10:15 a.m. Check Metra schedule online because we are thinking about taking advantage of sunny day to visit an Evanston park and walk around there. Train comes in half an hour, maybe enough time to make it but probably not.

10:16 a.m. Decide to go for it. Check on Nutmeg, who is still playing in bathroom sink, and get her to brush teeth now.

10:17 a.m. Run around house gathering supplies for day out.

10:19 a.m. Help Nutmeg get shirt on and tell her to put on socks.

10:20 a.m. Change baby and put her in sling.

10:25 a.m. Help Nutmeg get shoes and coat on.

10:27 a.m. Send Nutmeg to start walking down stairs while I get on shoes and coat.

10:28 a.m. Leave house. Get stroller from garage and power walk to station with Fil in sling.

10:29 a.m. Forget to tape "Millionaire."

10:30 a.m. Realize that forgetting gloves in garage was a mistake because it is colder than it looks out.

10:48 a.m. Watch train leave without us from a block away. We really would have needed at least another 5 minutes to make it.

10:49 a.m. Suggest that we save Evanston for another day since it is cold and windy out anyway.
Nutmeg says she really wants to go to Evanston.

10:50 a.m. Turn around and convince Nutmeg that it would be fun to play in school playground while we wait for the next train.

10:54 a.m. Call cell phone company to find out if Epu's broken phone is under warranty, but give up because I don't remember his social security number and can't get the phone battery cover off to find out serial number.

11 a.m. Nutmeg reports that she doesn't like this playground. She agrees to play and go home instead of going to Evanston, and I agree to walk to a better park.

11:15 a.m. Arrive better playground. Nutmeg plays, I sit on bench and nurse.

12:05 p.m. Arrive home. Manage to fold stroller with baby in sling but leave it on the front porch.

12:08 p.m. Get Nutmeg out of her coat, she takes off her shoes.

12:09 p.m. Lay Filbertine down on playmat, where she seems to enjoy wiggling and looking. Except for nursing time, she has slept most of the day so far.

12:10 p.m. Start making hot cocoa to warm Nutmeg up.

12:12 p.m. Heat up leftover salmon and rice, and carrot soup, for my lunch.

12:13 p.m. Update blog. Check email. Nutmeg returns from going to the bathroom (unprompted) and gives me a nice hug "for being so good on our walk."

12:20 p.m. Nutmeg drinks hot cocoa, I eat and read the Tribune. Unfortunately, the lead article is a bad child abuse story, meaning I must cry a little. I tell Nutmeg the reason for my tears is a secret, which delights her.

12:41 p.m. Nutmeg decides that she, too, wants carrot soup. Heat some up for her. Baby getting restless on playmat.

12:45 p.m. Change diaper.

12:50 p.m. Nurse.

12:51 p.m. Nutmeg leaves table, soup untouched. I suggest we have a "story party" on the couch and she leaves, excited, to gather reading material.

1 p.m. Book party. We read "I Am Not Sleepy and Will Not Go to Bed," "How the Grinch Stole Christmas," "Little Star" (a Dora book) and "Trains." During story time Filbertine nurses some more and has some cuddly awake time.

1:30 p.m. Time for pre-nap stories in the bedroom. We read a couple selections from "Richard Scarry's Best Storybook Ever" in rocking chair. Fil wavers between wake and sleep.

1:40 p.m. Tell Nutmeg she can take one book to bed to read for 15 minutes before sleeping. She wants "Shamu," but I say no because it's a paper book and she's been tearing up books during naptime.

1:41 p.m. Nutmeg throws a fit. I make her get in bed with no book.

1:42 p.m. When she's calmer I give her a board book, set her egg timer for 15 minutes, and leave, taking "Shamu" with me.

1:44 p.m. Put Fil in sling and update blog. Fil falls asleep immediately.

2 p.m. Nutmeg comes to computer room to report that she read a different board book than the one I gave her, and that her alarm went off. I send her back to sleep and say I might come lie down with her in a moment.

2:05 p.m. Attempt to lay sleeping Fil down in crib in Nutmeg's room. Try to roll her out of sling gently.

2:06 p.m. Laydown attempt initially successful, but sling rollout has left baby on her tummy. After letting her settle in for a minute, attempt to roll her to side.

2:07 p.m. Baby wakes up and cries. Tell Nutmeg I can't lie down with her. Nutmeg cries.

2:12 p.m. Nutmeg still crying and yelling from bedroom.

2:13 p.m. Eat Nutmeg's leftover soup with baby on lap.

2:15 p.m. Nutmeg opens door and says she has to go potty. Request denied.

2:19 p.m. Nutmeg seems to have stopped crying. Have cup of tea and two girl scout cookies while nursing and burping baby.

2:25 Put Filbertine in swing. She watches colorful toys.

2:27: Call Cingular about Epu's phone. Find out the warranty expires TOMORROW. Whew! They arrange to send a new Razr express.

2:40 Clean kitchen while sort of watching Rachel Ray. Sad because no "Millionaire." Fil drowses in swing.

3:15 p.m. Talk to Realtor on phone while finishing kitchen cleanup. Agonize over Evanston-versus-Oak Park and discuss negotiation strategies.

3:20 p.m. Take out diaper trash, bring up laundry.

3:28 p.m. Move Fil to Snuggle Nest and start Roomba in kitchen.

3:30 p.m. Update blog.

3:34 p.m. Watch Jeopardy while folding laundry and cleaning up bedroom.

4 p.m. Continue same while news is on.

4:15 p.m. Fil wakes up and nurses, burps. Very little spit-up today! (Apparently elimination diet is working.)

4:28 p.m. E-mail and online house research while holding Fil. Find and print out new recipe for carrot and pineapple muffins. Wipe green booger off Fil's nose. Wonder if that means she has a sinus infection.

4:49 p.m. Nutmeg wakes up crying. Read her a story, "Bear's Picnic."

5: 00 p.m. Make muffins with Nutmeg with some tunes on the radio and Fil in the sling.

5:30 p.m. Put sleeping Fil in the swing.

5:45 p.m. Put muffins in oven and adjourn to living room to look up green boogers in Dr. Sears' "Baby Book" with Fil on lap. Nutmeg comes along and reads a Dora book to herself. Dr. Sears says: Don't worry about green boogers unless baby also seems sick and getting sicker. Use vaporizer at night.

5:50 p.m. My parents call so Dad can tell Nutmeg that tomorrow is the first day of spring. Mom tells me our favorite 89-year-old barkeep in Sauk County is in the nursing home with a broken hip. He broke it dancing at his annual St. Patrick's Day party. Follow Nutmeg around the house and nurse more while talking.

6:00 p.m. Return Fil to swing. Take muffins out of oven. Clean up.

6:10 p.m. Have "muffin picnic" with Nutmeg. These muffins don't stay together as well as our usual -- maybe because I subtituted half the oil with applesauce.

6:30 p.m. Listen to Marketplace on NPR. Put new batch of muffins in oven and start dinner. Try to call Epu to ask him to pick up rolls for nitrate-free chicken sausages, but it's too late, he's already left, and I have his cell phone here. Nutmeg plays with her play stove and refrigerator and runs around making noise.

6:35 Nutmeg hits me with a toy. Back to time out.

6:40 Set table. Nutmeg emerges from Daddy's workshop/office and tells me she punched a hole in their cow pinata because she wanted to get the candy out. Tell her she probably won't get any candy from it after dinner now, and close doors to workshop. She howls.

6:46 Fil wakes up. Take temperature just to be sure. It's normal. Give thermometer to Nutmeg and let her take doll's temperature.

6:48 p.m. Change diaper.

6:40 Nurse while looking at Tribune.

7:00 p.m. Finish dinner -- fried potatoes, sausages, warmed up carrot soup and spinach. Leave sausages cooking on stove.

7:05 p.m. Update blog while nursing and burping some more.

7:11 p.m. Epu comes home. Nutmeg tells him about the pinata and he checks it out, expresses disappointment in her, and tries to convince her to leave it alone until upcoming birthday party.

7:15 p.m. Ask Epu to check sausages on stove. They're black.

7:20 p.m. Eat dinner. Get lauded for getting Epu a new phone just one day before warranty ends.

7:30 p.m. Nurse baby again.

7:40 p.m. Epu and Nutmeg clean up a little and then start playing with playdough.

7:45 p.m. Give baby to Epu and clean kitchen. She stays awake for a short time on his lap.

8:00 p.m. Talk to mother-in-law on phone while doing dishes. Have some cranberry juice and vodka.

8:25 p.m. Take now sleeping baby from Epu and put her down in Snuggle Nest, on her back. Epu initiates Nutmeg bedtime procedures.

8:40 p.m. Update blog.

8:45 p.m. Call a stranger who lives in Oak Park referred to me by our Realtor and talk while picking up the house. She has kids the same age, loves Oak Park. Says it has a small town feel where people are very involved and care about one another. Block parties, checking on neighbors. She thought they would miss being in the city but they now find that they are closer to many parts of the city than they would be if they had moved to Hyde Park or North Center.


9:00 p.m. Epu finishes bedtime patrol and I fill him in on Oak park phone call. Discuss pros and cons of Oak Park.

9:05 p.m. Fil wakes up, Epu fetches at my request. Change diaper and put baby in sleepsack. Hungry baby has rare crying episode to protest diaper change instead of immediate feeding.

9:10 p.m. Nurse in front of Internet. Find out there are 9 registered sex offenders in Oak Park, including one 3 blocks from top new home choice. That's nothing; turns out there are four sex offenders within a block of us now and, in our SF zip code, over 100 sex offenders.

9:40 p.m. Put sleeping baby on back in Snuggle Nest.

9:45 p.m. Put away laundry.

10:30 p.m. Earliest bedtime since coming home from hospital!

This was a really good day for me. I even made some headway with the housework, although I wouldn't use the words "caught up." If it sounds like I watch a lot of TV, I would point out that a) Only 1 hour of it was on while Nutmeg was awake, and she was in the other room, and b) I didn't really "watch" anything, I just had a few shows on while I did housework. Also, you can assume that while all this stuff is being done, I am also carrying on a continual dialog with Nutmeg if she is within earshot, and helping her when needed -- getting her a drink, reminding her to wash her hands, picking up dropped utensils and rinsing them off, etc.

everyone keeps asking me: what do you do all day? so here's the timetable today, although it's not a typical day since i got to sleep late and because nutmeg is still in her growh spurt nursing madness.

4:00 nutmeg wakes up and i lean over to get her out of the pck n play. instead of the 15-minute or so night nursing i've gotten used to, nurses for 45 minutes. when she falls asleep i put her back in the pack n play & she sleeps there all night -- a 1st, except for camping.
usually i switch her to our bed after feeding. i think that since she is sleeping so well in basinette i do want it in hawaii.

7:30 nutmeg wakes me up, all bright eyes and smiles. daddy is already outof bed. so tired -- didn't sleep much night before and stll trying to catch up. nurse her and then ask daddy to take her out for a walk so i can sleep more. he agrees but first talks with her in bed and insists on changing her in the bedroom, instead of in living room, as i request. after they leave, fall back into the sleep of the dead.

9:15: Daddy wakes me up to say he needs to go to work. Wow! What a great sleep. I was dreaming like crazy, the way you do when you're sleep deprived. Nurse Nutmeg while reading the Chronicle and drinking coffee, cooled off with milk. Just started drinking coffee again yesterday, and I don't THINK it's bothering her although not sure yet.

9:45 surround Nutmeg with pillows on couch and get some cereal for breakfast. Put Nutmeg on my knees facing me while I eat, and chat with her. She's all smiles.

10:15 Nurse more, then read paper as she sleeps against me.

10:45 Cautiously move sleeping Nutmeg to crib. she stays asleep. Jubilantly hit the shower, already planning all the things I'll get done if she sleeps for 3 or 4 hours like she should.

11:00 get out of shower and check Nutmeg. She's awake but calm in crib, sucking on her hand. What a big girl! Quickly get dressed as Nutmeg's vocalizations indicate that she'll get mad soon if she's not kept company.

11:05: get Nutmeg up and see that diaper has leaked through to clothes. bathtime. she cries when first put in the water but with a bunch of splashing and caressing with the washcloth, and a big smile, i convince her that this is fun. she smiles the rest of the bath, and doesn't even complain much when transferred from tub to towel, a time when she often howls. Get her dressed in cute pink and white outfit from Tom's baby.

11:30 Watch Who Wants to Be a Millionaire while nursing again. Then Nutmeg sits up and watches with me. She loves watching television already, much to Daddy's chagrin. I think it's just the colorful light.

11:45 Manage to dry and comb hair during commercial, with Nutmeg lying on carpeted closet floor. Can't remember if I brushed my teeth. Prop Nutmeg on couch again and do a few minutes of straightening up during end of show. Wonder when mess will go away if I have to nurse every hour. But hey, when Nutmeg's grown up, what will i miss -- the day spent cuddling with her and nursing, or the housework?

12:00 Nurse more while checking email.

12:20 Nutmeg falls asleep leaning against me while I write this. Gearing up to try another transfer to crib. Wish me luck!

Nutmeg wakes up due to crib transfer but after a little rocking i get her back to sleep and into crib

 

12:30-2:45 Yay, Nutmeg slept for more than 2 hours! I manage to: load dishwasher and do dishes. sweep and mop the kitchen where i suspect daddy spilled something sticky last night. wolf down a chicken leg and a cup of coffee. order birthday gift for mother in law. put away nutmeg's laundry and do some rearranging of her drawers to make room for newly fitting 3-6 clothes. put in a load of laundry and get the mail on the way up. yay again, mail contains a disability check and news that disability paid me for 4 days more than i realized. and an invitation to kay's baby shower, august 7. call to rsvp for shower. call EDD to ask about my paid family leave claim, and find out that as soon as they process the claim, they will send me a check for July 1-15. That's awesome because i didn't know when the family leave pay would start and i need it to be over by mid august so i can take 2 weeks of vacation in august. if i don't do that, our health coverage would lapse.

 

2:45 Try to make a salad while on phone with EDD but Nutmeg, as always when she catches Mommy attempting to feed herself, starts demanding to nurse. Have tried explaining that mommy must eat in order to produce milk, but child will not listen to reason. back on couch typing email while nursing, but she only nurses for a few minutes and falls back to sleep.

 

realize still have not brushed teeth, yuck! also day is gorgeous and have not left house. bizarelly, feel i cannot go out now because might miss Oprah. it's not so much that I would miss the entertainment, it's that I'm clinging crazily to the shaky framework of my daily "schedule." Ironically, unlike a lot of other mothers, i feel no need at all to set up a schedule for Nutmeg. I let her sleep when she wants to, nurse when she wants, except that I might wake her up if she sleep much past 6 p.m. because I want her to sleep at night.

 

3:00 Turn on Wayne Brady show while nursing. It's already been cancelled,  but it was very good. When Nutmeg falls asleep, sneak off to finish making and eat salad, and make one for Daddy's lunch.  nutmeg wakes up and i change her and play with her.

 

4:00 Oprah. nutmeg nurses more. Oprah's about BABY RAPE of all things. also street children in romania huffing solvents, which is horrible to watch: when the kid inhales from the plastic bag, he makes a noise like a power tool and his hand jerks uncontrollably, then he spaces out. hug nutmeg, overtaken with fear that she will someday huff solvents. imagine explaining to her that heroine, while addictive, is really not bad for your brain. Cut Nutmeg's fingernails. make and eat tomato soup. change nutmeg again.

 

5:00 Put Nutmeg in Baby Bjorn and dance to a few billy holiday songs. give her pacifier and she dozees in there. put away pots and pans, but clanging wakes her. go downstairs to get laundry. Nutmeg starts fussing as I'm trying to hang up clothes.  

 

5:30 Daddy calls to say he won't leave work until at least 7:15, so all urgency to get supper going evaporates. lie down with Nutmeg and nurse her to sleep, and try to fall asleep myself. Manage about 15 minutes.

 

6:15 Try to sneak away without waking Nutmeg. No such luck. Dance around in front of mirror with her, sing "Strangers in the Night." As usual, she smiles at her reflection and touches the mirror with her little hand. hold her in left arm while figuring out what to make for dinner. tuna casserole doesn't work out due to not having cream of mushroom soup. get out rice and broccoli.

 

6:30 nurse nutmeg. play with baby gym. her favorite: this star with a big smiley and a light on each arm, which lights up and plays music. she grins at it and talks to it as it plays. try to encourage her to lie on her tummy by holding the star in front of her, but she cries.

 

start dinner while nutmeg plays in baby gym. every once in awhile she calls me over. if i don't play with her for a few minutes, she'll cry.

 

7:00 change nutmeg and try some 3-6 outfits on her to see if i should bring them to hawaii. these ones are too big.  nutmeg grins while i do it, becaues we're talking and playing at the same time. put nutmeg in "Daddy's Girl" sleeper -- size 3-6!

 

7:30 nurse her while updating blog, then cuddle while updating blog.

 

8:00 daddy's home :) oops, dinner not ready.  finish nursing and hand nutmeg over to daddy so i can finish dinner.

 

8:35 Nutmeg crying. let daddy take over dinner so i can nurse her

 

8:45 put Nutmeg in swing and eat. Daddy complains about dinner's blandness and lack of meat.

 

9:00 Nutmeg wants out of swing so daddy takes her into rocking chair and reads her "The Cat in the Hat" with cute voices. I listen while cleaning up and emptying dishwasher.

 

9:20 Nutmeg starts crying and nurse her some more.

 

9:30 She falls asleep on my lap and I update blog, pay bills online. daddy takes bath.

 

10:00 Successfully transfer Nutmeg to Pack n Play. hope to soon get all lovey dovey with Daddy. 

 

10:10 Nutmeg awake in Pack n Play.  rock and nuse back to sleep.

 

10:45 Nutmeg wakes up again during transfer to PnP. Give up on romance and bring her to bed with us.

 

11:00 asleep